At a few points on this blog I have mentioned how much work I have been having and wished for a break. Easter holidays are finally here.
Well, it has been here for almost a week already. But I'm not getting any rest.
The massive schoolwork has got into me. Everyday during the holiday has to be involved with the schoolwork. It is no different to a normal schoolday except waking up later, sleeping later and being able to sit in front of my computer.
Schoolwork is still not done and "vacation" starts tomorrow, with my parents. Going abroad has never been a bad thing, but I feel like this "vacation" is somewhat different. With so many uncompleted work, I'll bet I have to check Facebook all the time to make sure progress has been made and all that. And even if I knew progress was not made, I can do nothing to it.
Holidays? It's just a word that means no school but with schoolwork. That makes no difference. And by schoolwork means working all day long until bedtime. What joy.
So as I leave tomorrow I shall panic and panic and panic more. All I can say to myself is - good luck.
Tuesday, 26 April 2011
Monday, 25 April 2011
It's easier to say than to do.
My goodness. Three weeks of not updating the blog - that's quite a long time.
I have been focusing on that "big" drama project lately and the routine every day is the same: wake up, drama, more drama, eat, drama, sleep. And facing 10+ people's voice and opinions are never easy, and it is basically impossible to listen to all of them. Well, no one understands that anyway.
And in every group there has to be a few people who gives very harsh and strong comments. And, boy, how much pressure that puts on me. Some people just keep on emphasizing how bad my work is and sometimes I just really feel depressed. But oh well that's the world - there is always someone who is unhappy with things.
What seem to depress me most is with people who keep on instructing me what to do but not how to do. I mean, of course I know what to do! I just need to know how to do it. Saying things are always easy, but bringing them to actual practice is never.
Someone told me that the project should be 100% serious, and when that day we were going to a filming location this person decided to stop by at a drinks shop and spent 5 minutes just to buy a drink for himself. And later he decides to pull by at a supermarket to buy more drinks. I was originally really happy we could be half an hour early but we ended up half an hour later than planned.
Boy, oh boy, what pressure it is, staying with people around me talking and talking like they know everything.
I have been focusing on that "big" drama project lately and the routine every day is the same: wake up, drama, more drama, eat, drama, sleep. And facing 10+ people's voice and opinions are never easy, and it is basically impossible to listen to all of them. Well, no one understands that anyway.
And in every group there has to be a few people who gives very harsh and strong comments. And, boy, how much pressure that puts on me. Some people just keep on emphasizing how bad my work is and sometimes I just really feel depressed. But oh well that's the world - there is always someone who is unhappy with things.
What seem to depress me most is with people who keep on instructing me what to do but not how to do. I mean, of course I know what to do! I just need to know how to do it. Saying things are always easy, but bringing them to actual practice is never.
Someone told me that the project should be 100% serious, and when that day we were going to a filming location this person decided to stop by at a drinks shop and spent 5 minutes just to buy a drink for himself. And later he decides to pull by at a supermarket to buy more drinks. I was originally really happy we could be half an hour early but we ended up half an hour later than planned.
Boy, oh boy, what pressure it is, staying with people around me talking and talking like they know everything.
Monday, 4 April 2011
That messed up night and that messed up guy
I guess I need to brush off the dust on my blog. It's almost been a month.
And tonight, way past my normal bedtime, I am still staying up. Facebook messages popping up all night long, and my Word document keeps on changing as I receive these messages.
I think I've mentioned how I am working with another 10+ people in a pretty large-scaled project. As a group leader for this film-based project I'd have to set up internal deadlines for scripts and all that to be due, in order for the next process to be carried out. For some reasons these "internal" deadlines seem like nothing and nothing but a bunch of numbers linked up together. I ended up delaying the deadline for two months and it's still not done. Filming starts this weekend. Ho.
Regardless of the uncompleted script, I have to start plan the production schedule. So I opened this Word file and started typing in dates which I have announced months ago and arrange a timetable for each scene to be filmed. Fair enough, I placed these schedules on Facebook.
What I got eventually, was people telling me they are not free on this day and not free on that day. Chaotic. So I had to keep on changing the schedule to make sure the schedule fits everyone's schedule, to a point that the schedule got so messed up I have no idea where to start changing it.
Often at nights I get so frustrated with all the mess this filming project has ended up with. Everyone seemed to enthusiastic at the beginning but when I came to realization, no one gives a damn. No one. Well, maybe they do when I start to use really harsh words.
I have never been a strong person. I'm known to be weak. What you say I do. Looks like it has been incepted into these people's minds that they would label me as an ignorable person already.
No good. My mind isn't functioning.
Just as my friend leaves this comment on my very serious status (well I hoped I sounded serious enough) with some kind of word that seems to be some kind of internal joke I would never, and never want to, understand, all I'll say is: Mess up for all you care. I'll do it my way.
CC note: I guess I haven't been a good writer these days. I just realized the title had an inappropriate sense, but that'll do. :D
And... whoever is going to leave a comment saying sorry, you know I'll answer "it's ok :)" - the biggest lie ever on Earth, perhaps.
And tonight, way past my normal bedtime, I am still staying up. Facebook messages popping up all night long, and my Word document keeps on changing as I receive these messages.
I think I've mentioned how I am working with another 10+ people in a pretty large-scaled project. As a group leader for this film-based project I'd have to set up internal deadlines for scripts and all that to be due, in order for the next process to be carried out. For some reasons these "internal" deadlines seem like nothing and nothing but a bunch of numbers linked up together. I ended up delaying the deadline for two months and it's still not done. Filming starts this weekend. Ho.
Regardless of the uncompleted script, I have to start plan the production schedule. So I opened this Word file and started typing in dates which I have announced months ago and arrange a timetable for each scene to be filmed. Fair enough, I placed these schedules on Facebook.
What I got eventually, was people telling me they are not free on this day and not free on that day. Chaotic. So I had to keep on changing the schedule to make sure the schedule fits everyone's schedule, to a point that the schedule got so messed up I have no idea where to start changing it.
Often at nights I get so frustrated with all the mess this filming project has ended up with. Everyone seemed to enthusiastic at the beginning but when I came to realization, no one gives a damn. No one. Well, maybe they do when I start to use really harsh words.
I have never been a strong person. I'm known to be weak. What you say I do. Looks like it has been incepted into these people's minds that they would label me as an ignorable person already.
~*~*~*~
No good. My mind isn't functioning.
Just as my friend leaves this comment on my very serious status (well I hoped I sounded serious enough) with some kind of word that seems to be some kind of internal joke I would never, and never want to, understand, all I'll say is: Mess up for all you care. I'll do it my way.
CC note: I guess I haven't been a good writer these days. I just realized the title had an inappropriate sense, but that'll do. :D
And... whoever is going to leave a comment saying sorry, you know I'll answer "it's ok :)" - the biggest lie ever on Earth, perhaps.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)